Hello, I am setting goals for me to do in the next 30 days. I call them my thirty day challenges. Here are the means that I will talk to of mine...
Don't leave food. Some ways I am going to achive this goal are: taking only food that I can eat, don't taking only the amount of food I can eat, and staying away from too much junk food. Food might not be precious to us but it is to Africans, so we should save food.
No computer games. I am going to use a computer for only studying and if I go home, I will not play games. I would rather play with my family.
Sleep before 12:00. I am going to sleep right after the lights go out, but if I need to go to the second study period, I will sleep right after it finishes.
These are my challenges, what are yours? Please tell!
FINAL ESSAY ASSIGNMENT
11 years ago
FIX:
ReplyDeleteline 1: a goal -> goals (since you're talking about challenges)
line 3: Some ... to -> The means that I will take to
line 3: is -> are
line 3: take what only -> taking only food that
line 4: don't ... eat -> taking only the amount that I can eat
line 4: don't eat -> staying away from
(You should unite the clauses after the colon into either positive or negative)
line 6: studies and if -> studying. Even if
Nice writing here, too. Clear and to the point. Many writers do not like using the colon. It is difficult to use and awkward in some ways. Try changing the sentence with the colon into many sentences that say the same thing.
My challenge for 30 days is to become a help to you to write better! If you need me or if you're in trouble, you can say "Help!" to me. I'll be there for you! :)